Hey What up My Dad friends and men friends! This week’s blog is all about you. For many of you, you’re the main provider for your household. You might be adjusting to new babies in the house and mom’s bonding time with the baby. You’re adjusting to her mood swings, body changes and hormone adjustments. You’re trying to feel where you fit in with the new changes in your home. You probably are feeling it at work too with everyone asking you how you’re adjusting and “don’t you just miss your baby and wife/significant other?” You’re probably feeling like, “where the heck is the compassion and concern for my well being?”
Have no fear. It’s right here. We at Move Happy get that you’re in a HUGE transition. It’s not easy and we’re here to support you through the entire thing. Included in this week’s blog is what science says about depression and dads/men, some personal and professional stories from my own experiences and what men had actually shared this week in my comments.
We’re grateful for men’s contributions because we are a woman owned business that cares about the mental health of all humans and don’t have the perspective that you do. We want you to feel safe reading this at your leisure and if you feel compelled to email us for more support or need to get connected to a therapist in your area and need some guidance, we’re here for you. Keep in mind we are a team of 2 at the moment and soon to be 4 yay 😊. We’ll respond to emails in an orderly fashion. If you need expedited support call 911 in medical emergencies or DM us on all social media channels and we’ll get you connected to the right services faster than email.
Truth #1 Know What Depression Looks Like In Dads and Men
According to this article, depression can affect 2-25% of new fathers. ⠀
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It’ll look a little different than mom’s with depression; more like anger, irritability and possible jealousy of the mom-baby bond, and possible stress from lack of intimacy from their partner. ⠀
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Often they’ll go to drugs or alcohol to cope. ⠀
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It’s understandable as this is a huge transition for the family. ⠀
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However, if you also have an addictive personality and now using drugs/alcohol to cope, where is the cut off switch? ⠀
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I’m curious to see any new dad’s out there and your perspective of life with a new baby. ⠀
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Any insights to other dad’s that might be struggling with depression is much appreciated. Feel free to screenshot the title of this blog and a few sentences of your insight and tweet us @MoveHappyTeam! We’ll give you a shoutout for sharing. Thanks in advance!
Truth #2 Know The Risk Factors for Dad’s and Men To Potentially Have Depression or develop it
Difficulty developing an attachment with the baby 👶 ⠀
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Lack of a good male role model 😔 ⠀
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Lack of social support or help from family and friends 😢 ⠀
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Changes in marital relationship, such as a partner’s lack of intimacy 👙 🛑 ⠀
Feeling excluded and jealous over mother-child bonding 🤰 ⠀
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Lack of rewards in parenting 😑 ⠀
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Maternal depression 🤗 ⠀
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Financial and work stress 💰 ⠀
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Low testosterone 🤔 ⠀
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What else am I missing? Take a snapshot of the title of this blog and tag us on LinkedIn with your insights. We’ll share it and give you credit for your contribution.
Truth #3 Know What The Global Prevalence of Depression In Dads Is
The verdict is out on that specific statistic because diagnosis in men who have depression is a lot lower than women with depression. ⠀
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However, this empirical study done by the NIH states that men have higher rates of completed suicide in the world than women; specifically the data included men in Canada 🇨🇦 at 77% of total completed suicides compared to the total that particular sample measured. ⠀
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There seems to be a disconnect between actual diagnosis and practical support to prevent men from making that final decision to end their life. ⠀
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I can tell you from personal experience working at a psychiatric hospital that 87% of the patients were men and many of them had scizophrenia, BiPolar disorder, Obesity/or morbidily obese and also had depression. ⠀
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I believe in my soul more efforts need to be targeted to support the safety of men taking about mental illness in society, the workplace, and at home 🏡.⠀
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I would love to gain your insights and personal stories of either struggle or resolution by tagging me in a song that represents hope to you on my tiktok account @TheRealMoveHappy. It could be you singing or a song that resonates with your healing journey. I’ll duet them all for this month as long as the videos are on the platform!
Truth #4 Know what causes depression in dads & some practical strategies to help empower dads to move towards their own happiness.
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According to the National Institute for Mental Health (NIMH) article, there are 3 major possible causes for depression in men/dads: ⠀
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Genetic factors—men with a family history of depression may be more likely to develop it than those whose family members do not have the illness.⠀
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Environmental Stress—financial problems, loss of a loved one, a difficult relationship, major life changes, work problems, or any stressful situation may trigger depression in some men.⠀
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Illness—depression can occur with other serious medical illnesses, such as diabetes, cancer, heart disease, or Parkinson’s disease. ⠀
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Depression can make these conditions worse and vice versa. ⠀
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Sometimes, medications taken for these illnesses may cause side effects that trigger or worsen depression.⠀
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Some practical strategies to support dads/men with depression include: ⠀
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Active listening 👂, recognizing that anger 😖 and aggression are possible signs and to be extra compassionate keeping your volume down to prevent escalation of conversation, ⠀
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Encourage them to exercise 🏋️♀️ and maybe join in with them,
Look for meet up time for your spouse/friend to hang with the boys because they tend to isolate themselves, ⠀
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Medication 💊 , etc⠀
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Any other ideas from men/dad’s out there? ⠀
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I’d love your contribution to other dads/men on some ways to help when they’re feeling depressed by tweeting us with your suggestions @MoveHappyTeam. We’ll reshare it and give you writer’s credit.⠀
Move Happy Updates
The Move Happy Movement Podcast© is in full swing! Together we are bringing awareness to mental health, providing practical strategies to empower those with depressed states to move towards their own happiness. Tomorrow I’ll be releasing episode 38 with JC and Brandi Chacon. They are a full time Air Force family. JC offers trainings on resilience for soldiers and Brandi helps soldiers in that capacity as well as holding down the family fort and all things woman. You do NOT want to miss that episode (available on iTunes by 6p CST every Sunday “Move Happy Movement“). Thank you to all current 481 listeners. If you love what value I’m bringing, please be so kind and write a review for me to help spread awareness for mental health & get more people with depression/depressed states to hear from the leaders I’m bringing on the show. Thank you in advance 🙏
The Move Happy World Tour Experience 1.0© is in full swing for later this summer! This is a live event we will be hosting at the Ryman Auditorium, a fun 5k run somewhere in Nashville proper, a mid-day educational symposium for medical practitioners & an exclusive VIP dinner for celebrity attendees. Currently I’m building out the sponsorship package and negotiating rates with The Ryman since I am donating 100% of all profits outside of the cost to run the event (building costs, insurances, hiring of staff, marketing, VIP dinner, etc) to my non profit partner John W Brick Foundation. We haven’t signed paperwork yet but they know that I’m giving them all the profits to keep their research going 😊. Paperwork will be signed once I hear back from the Ryman. I chose this foundation because they are funding research in alternative methods that support mental health (like yoga, cold water therapy, etc) and Victor is a keynote speaker in over 25 countries, Lynne is a RN and fitness enthusiast. It made perfect sense! They are the embodiment of role models for mental health.
I worked first hand in a psychiatric hospital with $100/15 people/month to contribute to my patients. I didn’t make enough money in this role but didn’t care because my patients deserved better and I had the skills to provide them a better fitness program than what they were being provided. When it turned out to be a big hit with the patients and enough of them said, “Erin you will be sharing this with other hospitals won’t you?” I had to figure out a way to do so.
This event is the first of an annual event that my team and I will be organizing around the globe to bring awareness to those with mental health and provide practical strategies and stories to empower them to live a life of happiness; whatever that means to them. The more research I have been doing globally, the more I am realizing countries outside of the USA need our support. I was googling the top 10 countries where the #1 death is suicide and the statistics are staggering. Some of the top 10 have 1 psychologist for the entire country. 1 😳. No wonder deaths are so prevalent there! They NEED our support and I am putting my time and resources to make sure this is an annual event to continue the progress of ending the stigma and providing a place of hope for even just 1 percent change to occur. My lifetime goal is to be able to live off of 10% of my income and give 90 percent of my resources to make the world a better place. This is one of those ways I plan to do so.
If you’d like to help contribute to the event or attend the event, you can order pre-sale tickets now for October 9th-10th 2020. Anyone ordering pre-sale tickets in February will be entered into a drawing for some dope Move Happy® Swag presented at the live event if you’re attending (and mailed if you cannot attend). Get your ticket or donate here.
I’m very excited high profile athletes and celebrities are emailing me and DM’ing me saying they want to be a part of this. I even spoke to a PR for a potential billionaire speaking about his overcoming bankruptcy story through a connection from DRock, Gary Vee’s right hand man. THANKS DROCK! You do NOT want to miss out on this event.
If there is a large enough interest in attending the event via livestream, I will make arrangements. Email me if you live too far away from Nashville, TN but want to attend the event and have purchased a ticket. That’ll help me find out who wants to attend but physically cannot afford to.
Move Happy is moving into the business world! “Work Happy: The Practical Tools For Effective and Inclusive Workplaces©” is in beta.
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Employees will benefit from this because the workshop is designed with you as the main focus in a positive manner. Employers will benefit from this because people that are cared for work harder and take less sick days, thus increasing your bottom line 💰. The workshop includes a follow up refresher (2 days total). Email me – subject “Workplace Workshop Interest” to get on the waiting list. Provide me a brief summary of the issues you’d like turned around in your workplace, your role, who are the key leaders at your workplace that make the final decision and their contact info (if applicable), size of your organization, and name of the EAP you’re associated (if applicable).
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The first 5 companies/organizations that sign up in February receive 50% savings and a shoutout at the Live Event! The workshop cost varies depending on the size of your organization & in person or online. Small organizations (5 or less employees) that want the training done online will cost less than larger companies that want an in person training because I customize this workshop to fit your business needs.
Have a larger organization? No problem, email me the details requested and I’ll work with your organization to provide a meaningful experience for your team and a profitable experience for your bottom line.
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As always, when you purchase from Move Happy®: ⠀
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💜 30 percent goes back to mental health research of your choice or if you don’t have one in mind, it’ll automatically go to our partner and ⠀
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♥️ 10 percent to your local Big Brothers and Big Sisters chapter and if you don’t have a local chapter it’ll go to your countries’ chapter or one of your choice⠀
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💜 or you can select all 40 percent to go towards the Move Happy World Tour 1.0 Experience© and any extra funds collected to cover the event will go directly to my non profit partner John W Brick Foundation. For this option, please email me your request so I can make sure the funds get allocated correctly.
And last announcement and MOST IMPORTANTLY … Please welcome Lisa Mahon as President of Move Happy! She and I met while doing karaoke randomly when I first moved to Nashville. She took my seat haha. I started a convo after my solo with her and we hit it off like sisters. I found out she used to run 17 Jenny Craig locations, was one of the top fundraisers also for Muscular Dystrophy Association & is a gorgeous grandma holding down the fort with her kiddos at home and has an amazing family that welcomed me to Nashville. I asked if she’d like to help with the live event and be a part of Move Happy’s growth and she gladly accepted! If you want to participate in the live event as a sponsor and have questions you can email her here. If you’d like to inquire about podcast sponsorships or any other means of sending money our way to help us fund this charity, please email Lisa.
Truth #5 How can Move Happy help dad’s/men with depression? ⠀
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If you’re a dad or work with dads that have depression, I’d love to give you a gift. You can either download 1 free copy or purchase 1 free copy for yourself. ⠀
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Any more than that please email me for permission first as this is my business and it’s available in my store. ⠀
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I designed this 📓 for adult patients in a live in psychiatric hospital that helped me through the tough time of losing my father. ⠀
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We journaled together on topics related to happiness and had 5-10 minute group discussions then we worked out together. ⠀
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87% of my patients were men and spread the word about my group around the hospital so I’m thinking it’ll also be helpful for you too. ⠀
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The rest of the emails are geared more towards mental health practitioners so if they don’t apply to you, feel free to unsubscribe. ⠀
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However, if you ever think you’d be interested in information related to children with depression and future topics with Move Happy Family, keep yourself on the list for updates in the future. ⠀
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All that I ask if you do download the journal for free ($19.99 value) is that you share something you learned from it on social media with a few sentences to help spread the word & tag me in your post so I can see it. ⠀⠀
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Thank you in advance for your support! ⠀
So there you have it folks. Men and dads can struggle with depression short term, chronically over a period of time, and even through traumatic experiences. They probably are at higher risk than women because of social stigma to be a strong man and not talk about their feelings. They also have higher risk than woman of completing possible suicides and need more efforts at the prevention point. This blog is not an all inclusive writing but it’s a start. We encourage you to share your insights, share your struggles and share your possible solutions. If you look deep within yourself men/dads, I’m sure you already have the solution to keep dreaming and pressing forward towards a life you were designed for. Don’t give up. We’re supporting you and we’re here if you need support along the way.
Don’t forget to tell someone you love them today
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