Stress sounds so negative 👎. It actually can be of great value to you if you’re wanting to have a stronger level of performance, cognition, relationships, and work opportunities. Imagine never having stress a day in your life. The likeliness of you being able to deal with stress when it did happen for the first time would be slim. Now, imagine dealing with stress on a regular basis and having mentors and reading materials provided to you to support you throughout your journey. You’d probably be able to manage the stress better and also use the tips to help guide your life in a more streamlined process towards your dreams. Reality is a mix between the two currently. There are resources for people, but there’s also the factor of admitting you need help, knowing how to find the resources, and being able to afford the resources in most cases. You might have some positive experiences around stress as well as some not so good experiences learning how to deal with it.
The following blog is all about dealing with stress (positive and negative) and providing you practical strategies through science, my personal experiences, and if you stay to the end, a program I’m really proud to share with you.
If you’re loving the content I share, I’d be honored if you’d share it with a friend or loved one. After all, knowledge is power and the more people that read my content and hear my message, the greater my impact on the world 🌎 will be.
My mission in life is to move people away from depressed states towards their own happiness through practical strategies in mindset, community and fitness, so they can in turn make a positive impact on others. Won’t you please support me on this journey?
Magical Way #1: Identifying Stress In Your Life and The Frequency Of That Stress Is The First Step Towards The Best Life Ever
Acute Stress is recent stress you’re going through or something that is coming up. Usually it’s a temporary thing you go through, like an upcoming test, presenting your PhD Dissertation, or a small argument with a friend or colleague.⠀
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In small doses, acute stress is no biggie, but long-term it can be detrimental to your health.⠀This article written by the National Institute of Health talks about the effects of stress on your brain, health and memory if you’re dealing with acute (short term) or chronic (long term) stress. Stress in small doses can actually improve memory and judgement but going past the threshold, drastically decreases cognition, judgment and memory. My takeaway is that identifying stress in your life is the first step, and making plans to properly dealing with it will help move you towards a more productive and happier life.⠀
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Make sure you can identify those acute stresses and make your plan of action to move forward.⠀⠀
Magical Way #2: Creating A Plan & Executing It To Remove Chronic Stress From Your Life Can Improve Your Wellness
Chronic stress is something you have been dealing with long-term. It’s long lasting, & you don’t feel like you have control over the stress.⠀There are some long-term harmful side-effects to it like: chronic pain, cardiovascular disease, obesity, and more. Check out this article about it from Dr. Legg. He provides some good tips towards the end that you can incorporate in your plan of action.
Magical Way #3: Knowing The Difference Between Eustress and Distress’s Impact on Your Health & Applying Strategy Can Improve Your Work, Home, & School Life
Distress is negative stress that effects your body, physiology, mindset, etc (like suffering from physical abuse, car accident, someone yelling at you, etc). It can be acute (short term) or chronic (long term). It typically is not seen as positive because it’s things you have to deal with that aren’t fun. If you can somehow find the silver lining or the lesson in the situation, it can help to provide you insight as to the purpose of the situation.
In Buddhism, it is often talked about as the Ying and Yang. One cannot be happy all the time, just as one cannot be sad all the time. Life is all about balance and learning to appreciate it all. Easier said than done I know, but give it time and be easy on yourself as you’re learning a new way to live.
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Eustress is positive stress that effects your body but tends to be some stress related to positive events (like getting ready for a wedding, presenting something you’re excited about in front of a large audience). Typically these kinds of stress are gathered from a more positive experience or situation. They are the kinds of stress you want more of in your life to a certain degree.
For example, when I was in high school, I was blessed with the opportunity to perform about 40 times a year in this elite singing and dancing 💃 group, “Music Company.” This was a group that everyone in choir wanted to be in from elementary through high school.
It was an exclusive group that was reserved for the best of the best singers in the district. My oldest bro Jason was in it when I was 10 and mom would drive me to their performances because I was home schooled. I dreamed of being in the group because I really enjoyed singing and loved to dance 💃 too. My time finally arrived and I was selected as an alternate my sophomore year.
The year right before, when I was at Spanaway Jr. High, was the year I had my first awakening of my super power (vision – but didn’t know what was happening). I had major depression and anxiety and didn’t talk for 2 weeks straight. I didn’t make it into the group initially. My eldest bro was returning from Japan after being away for 3 years, I was transitioning into high school (we had 10-12th grade and jr high system at the time), I had a teacher the year prior tell me I was bad at organizing (and I had only been in public school for 3 years so struggling with socialization), and also had another teacher that left mid-year for cancer treatment. To put it into perspective, my first year in public school when I was 11, my dad went through his own battle of cancer treatment and lost his kidney and almost 100 pounds in a few months, so I was a nervous wreck for my teacher and internalized it all. I started getting counseling for the 3 sessions that my parent’s insurance allowed and money was a struggle in the family so I didn’t want to be a burden any further. I didn’t tell my parents that, I just felt it and knew I could create a way to figure it out without costing the family another expense.
My parents took me to my pediatrician to discuss some options and he met with me privately. He asked me how I felt about taking medication for my sadness and I told him I wanted to try something else besides pills. I didn’t know why but I wanted to try something else. I told him I didn’t want to have to rely on a medication to make me feel normal. He didn’t like that answer. He brought my parents back in the room and told them that we had decided to give the medicine a try and sent us away with a prescription. I had been so withdrawn that I didn’t know how to speak up. Later in the car ride home I told my mom what happened back at his office, that he lied and didn’t let me speak. She told me I could try the meds for a couple days and if I didn’t like them, we’d try something else.
I tried them for 2-3 days and my anxiety got worse to the point where I was afraid to leave my house and worried about the future. I don’t think looking back that the meds could have affected me that quickly, but I was so thrown off by the fact that my own doctor lied to my parents, that it made me not want to even try a different medication. I didn’t know it at the time, but I am a visionary and my super power is seeing into the future and making plans and strategies on BIG SCALE DREAMS. I was still learning this power back then and didn’t know how to control it yet. I stopped taking the meds and started listening more and more to Mariah Carey because she always made me feel happy and memorizing every single track from her 90s albums.
I also started running and took a hip hop dance class that summer with my friend Anneliese. She was my bestie 9th grade year with 5 out of 6 classes together. She’s running for office in WA now like she said she was going to do back then and get a PhD which she’s doing too. I’m so proud to know her and having been positively influenced by her. Her and her mama helped me work my way out of my depression by doing fun things like going to a hockey game, learning how to French braid hair, hanging with her cute Pomeranian, and just plain having girl time.
I had a paper route since I was 9 that mom would drive all 3 of us for (we each had our own routes) and I used my earnings to pay for the dance class with some help from mom & dad for my birthday present. Then I found out that I got accepted to join the “Music Company” as an alternate and attend summer camp down in Weed, California with world famous choreographer John Jacobson, Grammy Award Winning Composer Roger Emerson and Kirby Shaw. Thanks to Mr. C keeping his standards of excellence high for his elite music group, I never gave up and was graced with an opportunity to learn to perform better since I had tied with a senior for scoring and she had to move out of district unexpectedly.
We went to the College of The Siskiyous Jazz Camp for an entire week every summer so we didn’t miss any school. July we took a break from all work so Mr. C could go on vacation and we could have fun. August we worked 3 hours a day Monday-Friday solidifying our music set for the year. We rehearsed an hour every day after school the entire school year as well. We also practiced our dance set and prepped for our first gig performing for the school teachers luncheon of Bethel SD at Pacific Lutheran University and prepped for the Puyallup Fair (now called Washington State Fair). Labor Day weekend usually was the start of the school year for us so by then we had 2 performances already done. By the end of each school year we averaged 40 performances (120 gigs for the course of my high school experience). Most of them were paid gigs to provide us money to pay for the bus trip to the event, funding for new equipment to be able to keep the program improving (like wireless Britney Spears mics, and $600 dresses and tuxes). This taught me how to mange eustress and distress experiences for a greater fun purpose. I also had to mange my time because I missed a lot of school to be able to perform and we had to keep a high GPA to not get kicked out of his group. We were leaders in the low income school and I was proud that I got to be a part of the legacy that inspired me through my childhood.
Being on stage is a high level of hormones being released in your body which can effect your memory, cognition, and performance. If you don’t do it a lot, it can seem like an acutely stressful situation. However, we practiced and actually performed real live shows so often that it became automatic for me. It raised my stress muscles so to speak, to a level where I can interview celebrities on my podcast and not be nervous because I have already gotten to do so many badass things that it’s not scary. I think this really helped me when I started doing video content on my channel and why my brand is exploding so quickly now because I just take a lot of action now and am not afraid to ask big names to be a part of my movement because they’re people just like me.⠀Check out episode 2 for a recent guest on the Steve Harvey Show or episode 4 for a current celebrity hair stylist that’s worked with Lil’Kim, Venus and Serena Williams, and more. I’ve got 7 months recorded already and 3-5 requests every week from people now! It’s so cool and I’m still in awe at how God has completely grown me out of that shy little girl into a bold courageous woman.
I’ve changed so much since I was 14. I am so grateful for the experiences like the “Music Company” and positive influences like Mr. Crouse and the people he connected me with. When I was in graduate school, I wasn’t allowed to get a music major because my undergraduate degree wasn’t in music (that’s just how US school systems work and the FAFSA unfortunately).
I however had the coolest advisor from Australia, Dr. Vicki Ebbeck (she’s Australian and the editor for the American Psychological Association). She asked me, “Erin what do you want to spend an entire year on that will be fun for you to create?” I’m so glad she asked me that because I ended up creating 5 songs, dances, curriculum, lesson plans, intended for 5th grade level but really was geared towards high school/college level because of the complexity of my creation.
It was so impressive that I was invited to present it at the AAHPERD Regional Conference in Montana in 2012 but couldn’t afford to go sadly. They’re called SHAPE America now and I will present something on their national stage in the next year or two once I submit my application (maybe by then they’ll fund my trip too. If you’re reading this and have connections, let me know haha).⠀
I also used that musical I created to get selected for hire as a music teacher in a school district when I lived in Elma, WA in 2012. During the interview, I taught my song “Trigger” to 2 principles, 1 middle school music teacher and 1 elementary music teacher. They selected me for the job. Unfortunately, the No Child Behind Act prevented the district from hiring me because I didn’t have a music endorsement to teach.
I was directed to contact my undergrad school and they informed me I would have to get a BA in music 🎶 in order to get the endorsement and unfortunately the financial aid system that provides loans does not let you get the same degree or a lesser degree. I literally couldn’t get a music endorsement because I had a MS already.
Guess what though? I know I would have totally rocked as a music teacher, and maybe down the road I’ll teach some music, but for now, my journey has brought me to running two companies, and incorporating my vocals on my podcast (I sing on every episode during outro 😊). I love every minute of every day I’m living right now!
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Magical Way #4: Regularly Planning Fun Events Sprinkled Throughout Your Months Can Positively Impact Your Work, Home & School life
External exasperations are life events you’re not in control of. These happen with little to no warning. They could be environmental, spiritual, or social, that you have little to no control over. They can negatively impact your mind, body, & well-being.⠀
For example, around 8th or 9th grade for me was the terrible event at Columbine, HS in Colorado. For those of you that don’t know this event, it was a sad day when two high school students who were angry at the world decided to kill many peers and teachers and then end their own lives.
The people in Columbine and the world around them couldn’t have prepared for anything like this. I remember it effecting my spirit so deeply. I was heavily involved in my youth group at the time and there was an event at the nearby university. One of the parents of the students that was murdered was speaking to us about forgiving the murderers. He lost his baby girl and yet here he was wanting us to not be angry at them.
I remember him talking about his daughter and how she loved everyone at the school and loved Jesus. She tried to befriend one of the murderers with kindness a few months prior to the event. He pointed a gun at her head and asked her if she still believed in Jesus and goodness. She said she did and was shot point blank. Yet here her father was telling us all, that we need to forgive these guys and do kind things in our communities to prevent something like this ever happening again.
Wow, so powerful. I actually hadn’t thought of this memory until I started writing this blog. I believe this man’s story has positively impacted me so much and has really been a huge reason why I do so many kind things for others. I don’t need it to fill my cup (not all the time anyway). I do it because there is so much negativity in the world, things we can’t control and yet I can choose to do something to make a difference. Maybe I’m also impacted because when my eldest brother was in high school, he played on the tennis team. Two of his teammates were being immature and throwing eggs at people’s houses around Halloween. This angry homeowner got his shotgun out and murdered them. It hit so close to home 🏡. I would roller skate around the tennis courts and throw the balls to the guys. They all spray painted two crosses on their rackets. I know how it impacted me and I wasn’t on the team. Imagine being a 15-18 year old and knowing a close friend of yours is killed for throwing eggs at someone’s house. It makes you pay attention to how you treat others. Your actions make a difference (good or bad). You might not be able to control everything that happens in your life, but you can certainly choose to be a decent human being and not intentionally go out of your way to be a jerk.
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There are some things you can control to help reframe situations more positively like:⠀⠀
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💥 Getting good sleep⠀⠀💥 Having a well balanced diet⠀⠀💥 Drinking water 💥 Volunteering ⠀⠀💥 Eating regular vegetables 💥 Doing a small act of kindness to a stranger 💥 Plan outings with your loved ones 💥 Journaling
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Check out this great article from the Mayo Clinic on external exasperations.⠀⠀
Magical Way #5: When Leading Groups Use Your Resources To Simplify The Process In Work, School & Group Therapy
My Move Happy Facilitator Program© incorporates an entire week on identifying stressors. I originally created the program when I worked in a psychiatric hospital with adult patients that had 180-day court date assignments minimum or were there voluntarily for years (some 30+ years). Ages ranged from mid 20s to 80s. I ran the program 3x and revised it each time based on patient feedback, my reflections, and my colleague and go-leader’s suggestions (she’s a licensed Mental Health Therapist, bi-lingual and really cool Japanese #Bossbabe working 3 jobs by choice).⠀⠀
By the third round, I had gotten a promotion within the hospital and another colleague, Sue M, had subbed for me when my colleague and I were away with trainings. Sue told me she loved running my group because it was fun for her and the patients knew exactly what to do (that told me it was simple and duplicatable).
I measured progress throughout based on self-report likert style questions on happiness and self-reported perceived level of control of their psychological diagnosis, open ended questions and objective questions measuring specific fitness scores. Every term we measured progress and from the first round we had 85% participation and about 95% improvement in both happiness as well as fitness. Participation improved each round as did score improvement as a couple repeat members were in the group helping by being leaders within the format.
A few patients were discharged so I didn’t incorporate their data into my findings. I wasn’t planning on selling the program, I was planning on using the data to improve my program for future patients being enrolled. I had gotten the promotion within the hospital and then a couple weeks later state budget cuts happened and I had to go back to my role that was barely covering the bills. I was engaged at the time also and it turned into a violent situation. He couldn’t handle that I lost my promotion and money was an issue for us so it ended up ending our engagement (among another reasons). My patients encouraged me to share Move Happy with other hospitals. So that’s why I’m sharing it now and why I’m so passionate about sharing it from the testimonies within the year I ran it.
One patient specifically told me, “Erin I could see you leading this program on TV. You need to share it” – He is a former marine who lost his wife to cancer and was getting back on his feet healing from that grief. Another patient told me, “Erin, I’m planning on buying my first home because of your class. I don’t want to harm myself anymore, I know it’s bad and you’ve got me excited about my future.” Another patient hadn’t smiled in 4 years (my co-facilitator told me). She was smiling and laughing from 1 station I had on salsa dancing one day (that I learned in Jazz camp in high school). I didn’t know I could make such a big impact using the gifts that had been given to me. Enough people (including my manager Sue B) told me I need to share my program with others. So I packaged the program to share with other mental health facilitators or psych nurses that lead groups. I am also in conversations with getting a deeper level course accredited and offering it as an option for Continuing Education Credits through hospitals in the US and internationally. I’ve never gotten anything accredited before so I’m still learning the process. If you have connections or suggestions feel free to email me.
The program is 16 weeks long, 4 days a week for about 45-60minutes (depending on your class session time).
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Every day we:⠀⠀
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Journal 📓 ⠀⠀
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Group discuss⠀👬👭👫⠀
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Do Workouts with minimal equipment⠀(with 60+ workout demo vids 🎥 )⠀
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I also created a psychological questionnaire and fitness questionnaire so you can measure your group progress throughout⠀simply because all other questionnaires I looked up were between 5-10 pages in length and so extensive I knew I’d lose their interest. My questions are straight to the point and used to make the program better each time you run it so it transforms into your version that works best for your patients.⠀
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If you’re a group facilitator in mental health, public health, education, or you’re planning to facilitate groups soon, this is the program for you!⠀⠀
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For the first ✌️ that order the program, email me with the subject “I BOUGHT MHFP” and include your contact info and copy of your receipt so I can send you some Move Happy® Swag as a thank you for your support! Order the program here.⠀
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By the way, 30% of your order goes back to a mental health organization of your choice & 10% of your order goes back to Big Brother’s and Big Sisters chapter in your area. Include in that same email where you live so I can donate to your local mental health organization and BBBS!⠀⠀
Thanks for reading! You should have some practical steps now to help you have the most magical life in work-home-school.
Some fun announcements for Move Happy fans:
✅ Podcast episode released every Sunday! I’m working on getting it on iTunes and distributed to multiple channels. Check it out for now at TheMoveHappy.Podbean.com
✅ Move Happy Swag available exclusively for Move Happy Customers (purchase the MHFP and get some gear mailed to you if you’re the first 2 to order from this blog – must email me receipt copy)
✅ June is my bday month and I’m giving away random goodies on my Instagram/Facebook channel. Must be tuning in live to be entered in the drawing (some prizes include: signed copy of my book Whole Life Affirmations, 30-min consults, exclusive listening release of my up-and-coming duet with my bro 🎶 before it hits Spotify, and more).
✅ I recently launched Erin Nicole Media® because enough people were asking me for help with their social media content management & education. Facebook called me asking for my tips for small businesses. If you are needing social media content support and want to either take my class (1 day) or have me manage your content for you, email me some details and I’ll provide you a complimentary consult with strategies to improve your system (whether we decide to partner together or not).
I’m currently booked out until September for content management by myself and planning to hire some team members soon to help with the content management and sales of the program. Once I hire, I’ll be able to take on more clients between now and September. I do have a waitlist already so reach out ASAP to get priority on the waitlist. If you’d prefer to take my class, I have 2 spots left for that right now.
If you’re interested in working with me for social media management, I’m paying flat rate per gig on a contract basis with plans to turn it into full-time with benefits. I have 1 spot available right now and will be expanding more soon. Email me your resume and why you feel you’d be a great fit to work with me, and what you want most out of working with me beyond pay. You must be 18 years old or have parent permission if you’re really good at social media content writing, familiar with hash tags, running ads, etc for Facebook/Instagram/Snap/Twitter/LinkedIn/YouTube. For my sales team, I am looking for 18 years old unless you have a lot of experience and success you can prove to me as well as parent permission in writing. Looking forward to hearing from you from anywhere in the 🌍. I have 1 spot available right now for sales with plans of expanding very soon.
I am SO excited for my bday month! I ❤️ giving and I’m excited to have you on this journey with me!
PS: Don’t forget to tell someone you love them today
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